scale of 1-10 how well do I give head
5, but i have never had a 10. best was an 8 so if i grade you on a curve you are a 7. ish.
this is the second time this summer that a girl has called me a ken dol
you shouldn't let them see you without your pants on
He was so confused why there was a string hanging out of my vagina.
I bought a Christmas tree in my drunken state last night, after walking a half mile in search of vino and prior to my apparently playing boardgames with my boyfriend's family. There is no way you are on my level.
you know you were refereeing rock paper scissors for who got to make out with your sister right?
I'm sitting in class drinking a forty out of a paper bag. No ones said anything yet. I think my professor is trying to ignore me. Better start yelling louder.
Wierdest expirience of my life this girl literally just knocked on my door at 140am to blow me in the shower. Idk what im doing but im doing it right
She pushed me over. She offered me a shot from her tits. We're good now
Ack! That is the first dick pic I've ever received. A) congrats B) that is way grosser than I ever thought t would be.
You shouldn't have to. I think you should bust into work like "pay homage to my magical vagina!"
I wish I knew the extent of my injuries before I climbed over the fence. Might have avoided the need to purchase a cupholder for my wheelchair.
But don't thank me for faking being asleep, if I was the real wing man, I would have left the bed
Also not to brag but I got high last night and got us a host family in a chateau in the south of France
Well I found my neighbors on tinder if you're wondering how my night went
336: Dude I lost my.phone Wednesday night at a party and just found it, three days later, on the lacrosse field....what the actual fuck.
Randomize
