So as she is about to take the walk of shame she flips out. Apparently someone left a brown present in her shoes.
Sorry I wasn't really responding earlier. I was really fucking high and so into that car chase.
we screwed to my bar mtzvah tape, I became a man while watching myself becom a man
you freaked out because you thought your face lotion was cum in a bottle
Great, now justin bieber is gonna sing a song about chile
you grabbed the waitors dick and yelled '2nd base' and then he gave you his number. I hate your life.
CHAZ BONO WILL BE ON THE NEXT SEASON OF DANCING WITH THE STARS.
Internet Is back!
MY NEWS TRUMPS YOURS.
I'm still hoping for it dude. Random north dakota pussy. If my 16 year old self knew that these were my dreams he would so try to beat me up, and i think he could.
I never thought that it would get to the point where I would have to specify that by "hang out" I meant "fuck like rabbits." Growing up shouldn't be this way.
As we're eating sushi she goes I just want to get a disease so my mom can take care of me... Great first date
do i respond to the booty call for the guy with the bigger dick or the one who has the gourmet coffee i like so much? at this point i'm leading toward the coffee
I flashed the bar tender last night. Apparently I wanted a whiskey to go and that was the golden ticket. This is why I never come home
I told my therapist about the other night and he actually whistled and said "wow that is not good."
Just scratched my head and I basically rained glitter.
I was a psycho gf all the time...I'm sorry
I was drunk 90% of the time...tit for tat
Randomize
