Moving to Utah. Got sick of alcohol and have a severe wife shortage.
on the way to work, i saw an empty wine bottle sitting in the middle of an intersection. i thought of you.
i can respect that.
other girls like to lick balls but none of them live for it like u do
Had to use the product locator on on the four loko website to find them at home. Got to go in the backroom of a grocery store to get them. Dedication.
I definitely managed to work the word "aforementioned" into the conversation.. At least I'm an intelligent sexter.
It was also my first failed attempt at shower sex.
And then as he was trying to conceal his boner from everybody, you said aloud "just grab your cock and get out of the pool"
Don't let her tell you any different. She licked the balls of my hamster for that $100. It was a group bet. She won.
Is it a good time to tell him he's getting too clingy if he sent me a picture of my name spelled with Cheerios?
She who has the vag holds all the power. He will learn one way or the other.
It's true. There would need to be A LOT of data collection. Aka, dick-catching. I volunteer as tribute.
My sex life is driven by spite and alcohol
We need to know if his feet match his cock.
just turned another straight guy gay. Goddamn the church must hate me
If you left your bike out in front, I just watched some dude steal it.
Randomize
