they just came back. i guess "were gonna go get dinner" means "were gonna fuck for 5 minutes at the little league field"
I just pulled a feather out of my vagina.
I am not joking.
She put her phone in her underwear and it somehow managed to work it's way into her vagina. she has a BLACKBERRY.
he was persistant. I supposedly owe him a bj from high school.
What? Cold floors are soothing when you have a hangover. How am I supposed to pass that up. Even if I'm at my parents house
I just realize today that I've dated three guys this year with their own blog. Ugh that's embarrassing.
Article 1, law 1, section 1 of the apartment 25 party handbook: tarp will be purchased prior to any and all future parties. Aforementioned tarp will be placed on floor. Any and all sick patrons must relocate to tarp preceding the event of expulsion of bodily fluids. Failure to do so will result in ejection of guilty patron and banishment of the accused from succeeding party. All patrons must read and sign a copy before entry is granted.
On another note, convinced a 9 year old my hickey was actually a zombie bite.
You almost hooked up with 200lb woman in her mid-forties, because you were convinced she was adele. Your drinking problem is officially out of control.
my vagina is starting to think like a penis, and I'm not even slightly worried
I told the person I was on the phone with to hold on while I looked for my phone. I think it's time to stop doing dabs.
I just want a relatively mentally stable guy with tattoos and facial hair that loves Captain America as much as I do and will fuck me the way I deserve to be fucked, is that too much to ask for?
Do you know this guy sitting in front of us? Asking for my vagina.
Drink water, eat food, and stop tazing yourself
Next time we do shrooms i am finding an open field at sunrise and running through it and nobody is stopping me this time!
Randomize
