Just because i have a masturbation problem doesnt mean you can put 20 photos of Jesus in my room.
and then you yelled "out of the way, i'm a lifeguard!" and everyone let us through
i'm sorry, but my penis isnt the solution to your problems
Why doesn't the washer have a puke setting?
The hot guy sitting next to me in the lib is reading a book called "Impersonal sex in public places." How wrong would it be to give him my number when I bounce?
I have a cat, a bottle of wine, and a Brazilian man. I need to catch you up on my life
Is it bad that I've been making new friends through your vagina networking? I don't think so
I am disappointed by everyone's lack of ability to dance on a stripper pole:(
I found an industrial strength sharpie in the drawer so I started writing BONER JAM 2014 on everyone's foreheads so they kicked me out
Hook ups at LEGOLAND don't count right?
Are we playing inappropriate sexual encounters bingo?
Man, it's really obvious that I was either handcuffed or tied up last night. Either way, not something you'd want coworkers knowing.
I'm telling you, I 'm beginning to think that my vagina is magical.
dude. I can hear the air.
A true gentleman never tells. But yes, I did indeed get laid last night
might I remind you I fucked a 21 year old and almost did coke with strangers? you definitely came out on top
Randomize
