Would it be weird if I brought slabs of bacon with me to the beach?
he called me "his little blueberry cunt muffin"...how would that make you feel?
no homo or anything but the way you were dancing with that girl gave me a boner
Exactly how deep of a burn should you have when you pee before becoming legitimately concerned?
I just realized I have my pepper spray, gun, and vibrator all in one drawer. One false grab and I'm screwed either way.
Going to get a "plan B"urrito
No. I think its because I really and truly know that he is a moron and his future prospects are zoo animals.
Came back with a random sweatshirt, an American flag, and a for sale sign. Mission success?
but I truly enjoy making out with my best friend more than my boyfriend
Forever getting my life back together in gas station bathrooms.
i gotta stop hooking up with people just to get to their dogs
We are gonna have a bake sale and the preceded will go towards the abortion
Damn him and his beautiful face and body and penis.
It was a successful conference for my sales and my sex life. Those are probably related
Me and my boss just exchanged pictures of our bongs and such...I don't know I feel about this
Randomize
