I would do horrible things to your vagina.
Prove it.
i spent my evening searching "the sims having sex" on youtube
we're no longer friends
for our anniversary he stepped it up a notch and bought cool whip rather than the store brand. i was impressed.
Google Chrome's "top 8 most visited sites" page has become my motivation to stop masturbating
We were sexting and then the radio announced robert pattinson would be playing kurt cobain in a movie and it totally killed the mood
I can do anything tonight that doesnt involve an erection.
And there I was, sitting Indian style on the kitchen floor, my fingers covered in peanut butter.
Either I put my underwear on inside out and wore it like that all day, or I had sex with him. Its sad I have to guess.
You just kept screaming at everyone 'not to break your scarf' and doing somersaults
I mean your new thing is losing body parts and feeling colors so its not like we are hurting for entertainment
It was big, black, and had a smiley face tattooed on it. It was the perfect penis.
And that was the night we had mind-blowing sex with the score from Raiders of the Lost Ark blaring on vinyl in the background...
How much do souls cost? I feel like I need one if those.
Saw the guy I once slept with, he was buying Beer and shit tone of diapers. Glad to see how 2016 will turn out.
I just want to bone him one last time before he moves across the country with his new (average looking) girl friend.
Randomize
