She's just bitter because she lost all the weight only to discover she doesn't have a pretty face after all.
You're the host. Of course you wear the diaper. It's like wearing the pants.
I just remember telling jokes while vomitting
Also, never say you're cool with a threesome if they ask. That shit's a trap.
According to you, you were with your "Eskimo bro for life" last night.
So how was your new years? Did u ride a horse at 3am in zero degree weather? Because I sure did
But I REALLY want to hide my crazy for as long as possible with him so he'll date me.
There was a deer right in front of me when I came. Sex in the forest is awesome
I spent all the money my grandpa gave me for Christmas last night….solid start to 2015
Is the Glover Park Chipotle past the strip club?
Why is that your only point of reference?
Just answer the question
Moms love me. I'm the reminder that they need to turn safe search on.
He shampooed and conditioned his pubes but can't manscape for shit.
In this house, we have but one simple rule: DONT FUCKIN TOUCH MY STUFF OR I'LL CUT YOUR NECK IN UR SLEEP
You tried to see how many socks you can stuff in yor mouth and I just put on a damp sock. Is this what bestfriends have come to these days???
It's not even noon yet and I just fucked my professor's son in the psych lab..it's gonna be a great day.
Randomize
