People are allowed to visit it's just they can't be from Germany and have to wear masks.
My professor just used "labia" and "numchucks" in the same sentence. I am dying.
got a scholarship and a hot psych teacher. hello spring 2010
He ran headfirst into the atm. Thenasmed us what our spirit animals were...he said his was either a dolphin or a cabbage
She stopped mid hookup to ask me if we'd be done before Taco Bell closed.
Ok but if you die you have to get "I should've listened to Mike" carved into your tombstone
Are we sharing a room, or can I pack my vibrator?
Yes to both. We'll use the workout rotation from dorm life.
Today is going to be the longest game of "was that a fart, or do I need to go wipe?" I have ever played. Maybe the most challenging too.
As a Chick-Fil-A employee, I think you'd appreciate the visual of me almost accidentally pulling out my wallet with a thong hooked on it as I payed for my waffle fries just now.
we left when one of the guys tried to stick himself with an IV that he found
When we left, you were on your third beer. When we came back to grab you, you had a pint glass half full of whiskey and had convinced the band to give you a microphone.
would you like to venture to the magical clitoris forest?
Why do all the Father's Day cards talk about what a great dad they are? Why can't there be one that says something like "Thanks for sticking it to mom and making me possible, your sperm was appreciated."
No one with a hairstyle like that is allowed to insult anyone for anything
I. Love. Skype. Sex.
I think it's just been too long since actual dick has been inside you that you only THINK you love skype sex
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