Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
Dude ! Why is there vomit with whole pieces of sushi in the shower when the toilet is not more than 2 feet away ? btw you need to chew your food better,
Should I be offended if he asked if he could use saran wrap to eat me out?
girls mom is dying from cancer and she msgs me for a booty call. I guess people cope with their situations differently.
So apparently I ran down the hall to another party and started handing out uncooked spaghetti to strangers. You'd be surprised how many drunk people will eat raw noodles.
I love watching the kids I sold drugs to score touchdowns
I woke up to him drunk-t-bagging me, saying "huevos rancheros" were being served for breakfast.
Her fortune said that she will soon be free. She's taking her bra off at the table.
Shoot me. Oh my god shoot me. My moms ex "likes assholes"
VOOOODKA VOOODKA WE PLEDGE OUR LOVE TO THEEEE VODKAAAA VODKAAAA SAVIOR OF LIBERTYYYY
Just woke up. Will be over soon. DON'T LEAVE THE CHAMPAGNE UNSUPERVISED.
Fuck me I smell like cheese
Girl. There is no more toilet paper. You should have seen the twerking I just did to shake the pee off.
Listen all I know is that mistakes were made and she stole the car and drove half an hour for food at 4 am
A guy in a chewbacca suit just came up to me and asked me to buy him weed.
Randomize
