I will be home in 10 min. Dont be beating off on the couch
enter at your own risk
.....so he has a son. Josh. That is not his roommate
ur penis kinda felt like a vagina to me
I think I'm going to inject the gummy vitamins with vodka
I'm glad you're using your medical degree for some good for once
just cockblocked my boss's 17 year old son at the Christmas party
Then you can skip the embarrassing can I date your ex since you're a lesbian now conversation
in fingerprint form on my ass. Seriously not cool. \ni bruiiiseeee like a delicate fruiiiitttt. Heeeaaarrr the rythymmm
Yeah, first time I've shit my pants in my twenties... I'm thinking about putting it on my Facebook timeline
but we were going camping. it only made sense to bring the 6 ft bong
I appreciate having someone to objectively critique my dick pics.
In another note. Thanks for making me get a vibrator. For real.
My sister's exploding appendix just cock blocked me...
I was mad at him...then I jerked off. Now I'm over it. Orgasms fix everything, I swear.
You went to pound town last night and chow town this morning. Boy you need a passport.
The cop took you back from the hospital and the lady at the front desk said "how are you doing cal?" You said "how do you know my name?" she responded "you're the only person i've ever seen that can throw up in your back pocket." Skills dude.
Randomize
