Hey you
You're the only one I'll text back during sex. what's up?
Do you remember peeing on the wall and then yelling at us to stop looking at your dick?
other girls like to lick balls but none of them live for it like u do
Some kid just walked into class with his schedlue written on a keystone box.
the head trauma was worth the blowjob.
I think I should advise against you hooking up with a guy that throws "the shocker" up in all of his pictures on facebook. Just sayin.
I only had sex with him so I could try to steal his roommate's cat, what kind of girl do you think I am?
My mom just told me my dad shaves his pubes while drunk and I don't know how to feel anymore.
Then he rubbed shampoo all over my arm and shouted, "Garnier FUCK THIS."
I did a kegel this morning to determine if I had been penetrated during last night's blackout. Nope.
I woke up this morning wearing his boxers as a shirt
He got in a shopping cart outside of home depot and insisted we push him down a flight of stairs. For science.
We used to bone, but now she's my life coach.
Can you bring me some underwear? I feel uncomfortable going underwear less at a Remembrance Day ceremony.
My cat is sitting in the window watching the neighbor's dogs doing it. I think she's lonely too.
Randomize
