so craigslist just dropped their "erotic services" ads. there goes our livelyhood
Let's pretend this is a good idea before I change my mind.
It's cold our but I feel like a very blazed penguin
you know you've made it when it's your own pool table you're waking up on
I tried to say goodbye but you were hugging a trash can and I wasn't sure if you had clothes on
Priorities: waking up on your doorstep desperately clutching half a meatball marinara but with no sign of your keys, purse or housemate. Where are you?!
Do you think drinking vodka, rum and sourpuss out of a water bottle, in a class that isn't even mine rude?
Please don't smoke the bong in the bathroom while you shit. It is not a shitting bong.
I think my body is literally trying to get me to reproduce. "fuck someone! Anyone!" - my body
Head-banging is a very stupid way to injur yourself. But this opinion is also coming from somebody who can't walk right because they cut their asshole shaving last night, so it probably has little to no merit.
Fuckin' raining men in my bedroom while I'm trying to drunk eat a rather large portion of pasta. Like shoo I already picked who I'm sleeping with. Pasta wins.
Im selling my dirty underwear to pay for that cruise. NO JUDGEMENT . I love you lol ❤❤ also dont tell anyone
she is legit trying to fuck me to death between her and work i haven't slept in 3 days and have at least 16 hours to go before sleep is a possibility. can i crash at your place she doesnt know where you live
He's the one named Andrew. In his profile picture he is the one on the right in the monkey costume.
i just want a beer and a blow job. is that so much to ask?
and i just want a ring so i can stop faking it. is that?
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