Wooohooo! I'm sitting in the car like a creep watching people walk in and out of Blush. Lots of happy people.
Now that I've come to graduate college. I realized the only discernible skill I learned was how to roll a joint properly. go me.
Well thats $24,000 well spent.
I thought smoking would make her look better, but all it did was enlighten me to her snaggletooth
Sounds like a blessing in disguise
Sorry you had to hear me puke. I didn't know I called you. Was it graceful?
He is like the real live version of the state fair..
His bookmark is a piece of toilet paper. No shame there.
Even completely stoned shes amazing on the piano. There are like 7 people sitting on the ground listening to her like she's the messiah.
it wasnt even considered partying. it was like "ok, who can get the most shitfaced and not pass out"
So they found him after the wedding still dressed up in his feather boa and top hat passed out in a bush...
How is there no taco emoji?! That's some bullshit.
I mean with a sentence like that I knew I would be cumming
Got home. All the lights were on. All the doors were unlocked. My room was covered in beads, there's puke in the sink and of course our toilet is still broke. I'd say it was a decent Mardi Gras
Don't do anything I wouldn't do. Thankfully for you that list does not include male models.
I dropped my slice of pineapple on the kitchen floor and was just staring at it about to cry. It was really good pineapple.
I’m making a jello mold of my penis
Will it be as disappointing as your actual penis?
Randomize
