I totally got off with my controler for my ps3. Soooo glad I ended up with that racing game for Christmas.
Oh I also wanted to thank you for leaving your list of porn sites on the coffee table. Very entertaining.
I mean I'm forever immortalized as the one who puked in his dad's straw hat.
she chased the tour bus screaming I BET YOUR DICK IS THE SIZE OF YOUR MICROPHONE STAND. i think its safe to say were never getting vip passes again.
I was in the shower, he came in, had me give him a blow job, and left. I'm pretty sure I was just booty called. While taking a shower.
What's the appropriate I've been inside you but we're not technically dating valentines present?
His bootycalls folder in his contacts are divided into regions, we should have all become airline pilots.
Yeah well my vagina has expectations too but they don't get met all the time.
Right, because I totally see myself driving all the way down there to fuck his world famous penis.
At least I'm fat on the outside. You can NEVER change being fat on the inside.
Just from watching vine I come to conclusion that all pornstars are dog hoarders.
So I ate half a jar of mayo because I thought it would cure a hangover. I thought wrong.
His eyefucking isn't even normal eyefucking; it's eye anal.
I am the oldest one here and I STILL feel like I need an adult. help.
He took a shit in my shoe. A part of me is livid and a part of me is impressed because that’s some real evil genius.
Randomize
