i just had sex bonerless
i just google searched 'can you pop your ovary'
He was so confused why there was a string hanging out of my vagina.
just dd'd my mom home while she begged me to let her drunk dial my ex, jammed out to party in the usa, and then passed the fuck out. thanks for the genes mom.
The problem with having your drunkeness documented at a wedding is not only does it show up all over facebook, but all over professional photography websites.
Did you get the "i have a yeast infection from that wet frat bathroom floor" text?
Your cum is still running out of me. I pity the next person that tries these jeans on....
I did the walk of shame wearing his scrubs. Fucking med school students is the way to go.
Apparently love is stronger than SoCo
I just saw a commercial for God of War and heard the nickname he gave my vagina.
Let's be honest. I make up for my well below average sized penis with a great personality and a possibly successful future
stalking the twitter feeds of girls who have fucked my current fuck buddy makes me glad we use condoms
The beer bottle was sticking out of your zipper and you shook it onto unsuspecting patrons
I didn't rip your fishnets, WE ripped your fishnets.
I just made my dating life into my own game show. would you like to meet the contestants? (photos not included)
Randomize
