okay I'm thinking he doens't have a facebook...I'm on page 28 of Hunters
ok you need to stop NOW
So what does a sober person do in Vegas on a Friday night?
Also, just saw a homeless man answer a phone call on a blackberry...
there's a guy pushing a keg up the street in a shopping cart. you have to love graduation
Oh and I found some acid for the drive back to school, productive day
I bought an american flag today and by god im gonna fuck someone on it
She just mixed her Emergen-C with champagne... Vegas here we come!
So I'm dropping a fat deuce at work, and the lock on the stall door slips and the door slides open, when suddenly someone comes in. Now I have two options, I can either get up quickly and try to shut the door quickly (not easy to do with one hand) or I can just sit there and play it off like it's no big deal and I always dump at work with the door open. I chose option two, and it was as awkward as it sounds.
tuscaloosa is terrifying
like people here are just empty shells of drugs and sin
there is no mercy here
You literally just told me you're ditching me because of pizza. PIZZA? Wow.
Sorry I wasn't opportunistic about sucking your dick in an Uber last night
There's glitter all over his bed from my Pink VS panties... I think I might invest in similar styles as a way of marking my territory just incase.
He hit me with his bagpipe
Isnt that against the lesbian handbook?
I'm so hungry and so lazy that I'm seriously considering ripping into that packet of cream cheese in my nightstand.
He stopped the gas pump at 69 and gave me my receipt. He wants it.
Randomize
