I thought she had more class and brains than to date a complete numb-nut, drug addict, fuck up like him. People never cease to amaze me
you're like the ceasar milan of boners... you understand them on a different level.
guy picked up a cops taser, thing shot him in the neck, he went down and pissed himself, cop started laughing and hasnt called an ambulance.
Cumbucket.....OH MY GOD THAT COMES UP AUTOMATICALLY NOW!!
We're going to play a drinking game. It's called "Senior Year of College."
I still don't understand how I went from crying to blowing you in like two minutes.
Somehow ed fucked carrie while purposely not saying a single word to her all night. He just nodded and smiled.
Would it have been easier if he talked to her?
Yeah, but i bet him he couldn't do it. Now he gets a free taco bell combo of his choosing.
Just got walked in on while fucking in the lounge in the performing arts building. The janitors gave us five minutes to leave and applauded our exit
She acts like a 3 year old but with fantastic tits. This girl is the reason women are objectified
I am in his childhood bedroom and I feel like his trophies are applauding me and his stuffed bunny is disgusted with me. Did you know he was a mathlete?
I'm pretty sure my intestines are bleeding but I'm still going to Orlando to catch that orgasm.
Only great wives bring your dope to you when you are at the Cardiologist
My sensibilities as a lady demand we cuddle on the couch, and THEN have loud, raunchy sex. Idk, what do you want to do?
If a weird guy texts you in the near future asking if you are satan just go with it
Ummm so he didn't think I was serious about breaking up... Most awkward conversation ever
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