Do you think Patty Mayonase ever went down on Doug?
he was uncircumcised...I HAVE NOT YET REACHED THAT SKILL LEVEL OF DICK
I don't have the money to get a cast so we made one from stuff at the craft store.
they told me they were banning four lokos so yeah i did have to buy 42 of them
I'm sorry for throwing the cheese everywhere, but it wasn't my fault. No one was enforcing disipline so not really my fault for not behaving
Just realized I left my heels in their microwave. Whoops.
So my birthday was awesome. Only remember 45 min of it but I woke up with a girl on the couch and a half bowl of ground beef
i'm about to tell me dad "sorry staying in isnt an option. i'm fucking a marine tonight."
Im not coming back to that place until im drunk. If I walk in there sober Ill start screaming uncontrollably. Not words, just sounds.
It is very possible that having sex with you just now just got me into Yale
Love these next 4 months. Wake up from a college football hangover and get to put your hand down your pants and watch NFL football all day.
What eyeshadow color says "yes I am at the dentist, and yes I am hungover please don't judge my life choices"
Dude, he wouldn't have sex with me during halftime cause we were rooting for different teams and that would be "bad juju", I had to settle for 69.
I just shaved my pubes into a heart shape. if that doesn't scream romantic idk what does
Alright, I've had enough of this good girl shit. Tonight you either blackout or backout.
Randomize
