I'm just looking at Lindsay Lohan's vagina.
Oh yea! I was just doing that too!
his facebook status quotes britney spears so there is always that
Wow, you were right... Weed does start conversations
He passed out mid-signature
Made a joint out of my Yale rejection letter. Life is grand.
doing lines of blow through a tampon applicator in the study lounge at 7am so i can finish an italian composition that was due a week and a half ago...such a good student.
There is something depressing about eating toast in a dark living room by myself using a paper plate that says: "Let's Party!"
She asked the woman in the drive through to cover everything she ordered in mayonnaise, including here chilli cheese fries. Didn't happen. Then she started swerving at the car next to us screaming, asking if they had mayonnaise.
did you really just send me an instagramed dick pic?
The problem with Wednesday evening drinking is that no gets to my level. It's like like a one man party. But it's a goood party.
Now you know my pain. Live with it. Own it. Recognize it. Cause its like shitting napalm.
you start one little fire by the lake and the police want to talk to you all night...
You forgot the part where I played Slip and Slide with my own puke and fucked up my knee.
We kicked down a door together last night, pretty sure that qualifies us as best friends.
I don't want to hook up with him sober. That's pretty much like saying I love you.
Randomize
