Bein cut off at a bar is embarassing ...until you get to the next bar.
too bad they don't have a 'people you may be able to do' thing on facebook. it would save me a lot of fucking time.
similar to the time we made up the game of screaming at the top of our lungs any time a guy any of us slept with walked into the party. that went over SO well.
So I'm about to go to his house and have "I'm really sorry for cheating on you last night" sex
I shagged another guy with one ball last night. Are there really that many dudes with one nut in la or am I just a magnet for prostetic testes?
so high and i think i just ordered a magic bullet.
did you call within the first 18 minutes? can i have the free one?
Just heard a guy on the phone saying " ya ill buy the eight ball " then came to my register to ask what asile the sugar substitute is on.
She bellyflopped onto the poolside bar, broke one wine bottle, and stole another...the resort staff just frowned and cleaned up her mess.
They're doing shots to celebrate every 15 minutes passing. You can come get them.
Dude, it's not gay. It's winter.
Someone touched my vagina when we were out last night. The fact that it was you is inconsequential and I am still counting it as a pull.
I have just been informed that my company has ray guns. I WORK FOR ACTUAL BOND VILLAINS. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
He just didn't want his drunk dick pulled out of his windbreaker at the family party
I spend so much of my life shaving my body hair off and I want nothing more than his beard in all my hairless places.
I just hit 3 trees and a golf cart.. all on the same hole
Put me down for a bogey
Randomize
