Today at work while talking to my co-worker we both realized at the same time that last year I had a one night stand with his roommate and he was in the living room drinking coffee when I did the walk of shame. YAY.
Wow, you were right... Weed does start conversations
This Casey James character from American Idol is really gonna mess up my sex life.
Or maybe the fact that you know who Casey James is will be what messes up your sex life.
Ha ha. You should see the things I'm doing to my body at Bob Evans.
what's the appropriate greeting for someone whose bed you've had sex with someone else in?
The reign of the rally queen is over. Welcome to the age of the walking dead.
It looks like I murdered a care bear and put its blood in my hair to warn the others off.
jen just told me ur idea of revenge was saluting while letting his bong float away while attached to some balloons.
So everything was good he was big spoon I was little spoon and then I got peed on
I can't believe this. 100 bucks says my Botox lasts longer than their marriage will.
it was like teleporting. everytime i opened my eyes, i was somewhere different... usually the floor.
Some girl woke me up at 1:30 am looking for weed and the next thing I know I'm in a hot tub with 3 girls, 2 40's, and a blunt.
Just had sex in the room next to my parents. Heading back to school ASAP.
I'm slowly getting to where I don't hate people anymore.
Never mind. Some random dude just walked past me and asked if I was having fun. I snarled at him. I might still kinda hate people.
You guys do the cocaine and I'll do the dishes.
Randomize