i think my tv is drunk
yours is so small it looks like an acorn!!
Just saw a group of asian tourists in safari outifts bow in thanks to the starbucks guys. And no Im not high.
Registered for next semester classes drunk. Let's hope I didn't accidently sign up for history of dinosaurs again...
We just saw him running from campus police a few minutes ago. So no, I don't think he's still passed out on the quad.
he found you with your pants down, trying to straddle the urinal. no one should have to see their sister like that. ever.
Dude they have your information. Come back. The sheriffs office is here, they are pissed..please come back otherwise jail is inevitable. Call me
Look, if he's not the brother with three nipples, I'm just not interested.
Smoked Hookah in the playhouse last night. Childhood was so fun.
Also, horsecock action starts in about a month. Have you prepared yourself yet?
Im laying on the couch wishing someone was here to pour wine in my mouth. I need an alcohol IV
I am in his childhood bedroom and I feel like his trophies are applauding me and his stuffed bunny is disgusted with me. Did you know he was a mathlete?
Just realized I'm going to have to make you sign a non-disclosure agreement before my wedding.
I would say that that is the last time I ever drink a bottle of jack in two hours, but really who am I kidding?
Did your grand seduction include learning to play careless whisper on a kazoo or was that just a hobby
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