sitting in class between the roommates of the two girls i fucked over break. this feels like a bad version of wife swap
I looked at him all bewildered and he said, "what? I figured if it was under 30 seconds it'd be free."
I think one day, after evolution kicks in, my sons will thank me for having a 3rd ball. That's how much sex I'm having.
she tends to only attract lesbians and homeless men
Yes my plan is to drink the college out of me so i can be an adult by monday
It's official, there's a sex tape of me floating around some high school
You didn't even properly utilize my pigtails.
I thought my ass was sore from the gym then I realized it was from being spanked. Confusing time in my life.
You're more than welcome to join us! There's red velvet cake and apparently my pants are open for business I didn't consent to this
By the way I got my period today. No NHL babies for me.
I think I fucked up my elbow when I tried to fight off the paramedics.
She used my 100 Ways To Cope With Stress handout to wipe puke off her face
Something I can get at drive through, boobs out, don't want to get out of the car
I think I'm actually too depressed to do drugs, wow.
I'd like to thank Vicodin for getting me through family thanksgiving once again.
Randomize