Buhtt sex?
Herpes is a lot like Arnold Schwartzenneger. Because it always comes back. Also, because it is usually in some way in control of California.
ever had your bank call you to verify the 4 seperate bar transactions from the night before? I have
I had to sleep with my math professor to pass algebra. Apparently my blowjobs are only C+ quality
I don't know what he sees in her. All I see are horrible pancake nipples
Dude she looks like a female richard gere plus 400 pounds.
I want her autograph on my taint
Yeah, it kinda sucks. But it was fun while it lasted. And honestly, his penis is way too big for my life.
Dnt forget 40 tuesday,dress nice! Like job interview nice, like funeral nice, like a couple muhfuckas sittin on their lawn drinkin forties on a tuesday nice!
Promise me, at my funeral, you will re-enact our human sledding incident of 2011....you can use my dead body as said sled.
I looked the guy across the room straight in the eyes and said, "If you were any closer to me, we'd be making out right now."
I've been on this train for an hour and this women has been on the phone and all she's said is "guuurrrrrlllll, gurl, gurl." I may commit suicide.
I'm sorry you had to knock him out on your birthday. But that also means I won the bet that you'd hit someone so you owe me 40. dollars
dude me and this dog are gonna go bond oon the tramplene with stromboli... i think everyone is staring at me... being this high is SO stressful
Sorry. Im too sleepy to penis.
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