I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
i'm sending her a home depot gift card for the hole i put in her wall. call it good?
I only knew it was midnight because i got happy new years texts while i puked outside
on a scale of 1-10how much freaking out is acceptable if you just found a (possibly used) cock ring in the head board that your parents gave you?
I just got a ticket for the snow penis we made in our front yard.
Walking down the street trying to find the pants I had on last night
You said that my dog would "complete your puzzle" then you got naked and took it behind the bar
My vagina is not really on board with my "emotional issues"
I created a photogrid for every picture he has ever sent me of his penis. Now I can see every angle at one time. THIS IS GREAT.
okay when i look at this i can see it on the future news along with the headline "picture scandal involving senatorial candidate sexually harassing drunken idiot in what appears to be a pink room of pain"
On the bright side, only one more day until we aren't sober anymore.
Like, yea, let's talk sexy but also...LOOK! I SAW A CAT!
Of course I fucked him. He was wearing a rainbow cock sock and cowboy boots.
I would like to make it known to all of you that my penis is official retired, but it thanks you for the countless years of service you provided
It's an interesting experience to pee while a bird meows at you.
You need to get out of the house more
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