This needs to stop. I just vacuumed the wall. Adderall is a double edged sword.
I'm bleeding from my lower lip, and I have bruises around my neck. It was just easier to say I got mugged.
Don't worry about it. Anal sex isn't always sunshine and wildflowers.
Gin and redbull in a wine glass. They think I'm keeping my wits with a really yellow Chardonnay. Gonna get ugly after a couple.
I really want to lead this Amish guy into temptation
i just honestly didn't believe you when you said your brother was a fucking clown. ho shit you weren't kidding.
Martha Stewart has had a one night stand and is unsure if she's had a threesome. I no longer feel slutty.
You made out with him a lot. Almost as much as you told everyone Paul was the zamboni guy.
I woke up in a bath tub and my face was sore and it wasn't because of you, I was impressed
I have experienced an excessively hairy ballsack in my mouth...and it was horrifying. I keep feeling it in my mouth now. It's like hairy ball PTSD.
I know it's going to be a good day because he didn't notice the bite mark on my butt.
she crossed my comfort zone...i thought i was a freak
said the guy with a pink sex swing...
What the hell kind of sad excuse for a bottom are you
my friends roomated asked me this morning if we went to mcdonalds last night and i had no idea...that is until i checked my purse and found half a mcdouble in it...
If you really hate him do what I do: give him an amazing night of unforgettable sex then dump him. You’ll ruin sex for him because new girls won’t compare
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