It really wasn't that bad. Well, it was pretty bad, but only in 3 second bursts.
so are u like ashamed lol?
not really. i dont look at it as being homeless. im just going to pretend im on an extended camping trip
i'm sitting in the library realizing that the 2 most productive things i did this weekend was have sex and go to the liquor store...
I heard from anne today. She has a broken collarbone and is knocked up. Apparently florida is awesome
I just woke up in bed, rolled over, and found a whole pizza.
this is the second day in a row.
Oh. Yeah. It's the same pizza then.
You wore a man's plastic top hat last night.
No I didn't. Whiskey did.
Did you get an erection too during Paul Ryan's speech?
He unbuckled his belt, tipped his hat at me, then told me to "saddle up"
this is like your 5th cowboy right? where do you keep finding these guys?!!
I found my hair extensions. They were in my hamper.
There is someone hissing in the hallway. Not even a typo. Not pissing. Hissing. Like a large cat. Or a komodo dragon.
this dude, we had a connection. he kept smiling at me. it's like he knew i was gonna facebook stalk the fuck out of him
I like using largw condoms because they are more comfortable but also I feel bad because it's like false advertisement
Got stiff armed by the garbage man on the back of the truck...I just wanted to ride one block dude
everytime he speaks i want to fuck him less. i just wanna tell him to shut up and take his pants off and we could both be happy.
From now on he's gonna have to shave first. It feels like I got eaten out by a chainsaw!
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