The size of her hoop earrings are directly related to how much of a slut she is.
I know im too high when i think porn has an interesting story line.
at the resort hottubing with french twins, who brought champange. this should be a postcard.
i hate always having to make my eye shadow look really good since my eyes always end up closed by the end of the night in pics
He poured syrup on all those broken dishes because "syrup is magical, and by the time we wake up, they'll be fixed."
You don't have to believe me. My vagina knows it happened.
So he might be the smartest man alive. He had the stripper pick him up taco bell on the way to the room for an extra 50 bucks.
I don't think I even want to know why you are sending my husband pictures of your nutsack.
Just realized I'm going to have to make you sign a non-disclosure agreement before my wedding.
btw my ex came by last night and saw the pregnancy test intructions. awkwarrrrd.......
Gay bathhouses. They're actually a thing. So god does exist. And he doesn't hate me as much as you think he does
Reports of my death were greatly exaggerated.
That was awkward , having sex with her while her husband watched via Skype. I'm a porn star or a target. Idk
you know you're sexually deprived when you're holding a warm taquito in your hand and your vagina starts to tingle
Obviously you're feeling a little sexually frustrated.
I consider humping a stranger every ten minutes when I walk in the street.
Randomize
