i feel like im doing the pre-walk of shame..like every car that drives by is like, ooooo look at that girl, in that itty bitty dress, yep shes about to get her skank on tonight...
she looked like she should be chained to micheal vicks radiator
the girl next to me in class just threw up in a waterbottle during our exam.
Its really not funny anymore. I need to stop shaving while i'm drunk
why is there cat hair all over my deoderant?
she wanted to smell more freshershest than you.
i totally just wrapped her wedding gift in tin foil. These are the skills 2 bachelor's degrees have given me.
Porn. Physics. Porn. Icecream. Porn. That's my life now.
I'm ok. I've got the pantsless-with-dignity thing down pat
I'm trying to get fucked by 4 girls here, and you're worried about verb tenses?!
Well I'm going to San Francisco next weekend for pride. I'm sure I'll end up drunk and on a beach at some point.
It's truly amazing how much porn I can get in while my phones at 1% battery life.
What the hell man, you basically stole my girlfriend with a bucket of KFC.
That said I did get head on the roof of a 15 story building which, regardless of quality, is still cool
I dont understand why so many people are content staying in and avoiding alcohol and sex
Nice people suck dick too. I'm proof.
Randomize
