I cant date a girl that sucks dick at sucking dick
I literally just watched a girl motorboat herself
thats the mark of a good guy. when you can period all over his leg and he still thinks you're beautiful!
no i brought the cat to the bar. I got a weird look when I walked in but now everyone loves her.
Just got a blowjob in her closet with two people sleeping outside in the room. I feel like the emperor of college.
Just found out my 21st birthday is on a Wednesday. The possibilities are cheap, as well as endless.
Beautiful wedding. Beautiful bride. I got shitfaced. Came home and ate two corndogs. I'm still single.
The sad thing was my husband told her its ok to make out with me. Bar Tuesdays will live on regardless.
I went eBay shopping last night. Turns out I brought a Viking drinking horn. I can't even be mad.
Kings cup with teenagers tonight
Done deal
Will you bring a case of beer down to the hot tub? Me and Phil don't want to feel feelings anymore
She was from Wisconsin, she had great boobs... I mean... It's a dairy state....
I never thought I would have to arrest my own parents on a sunday night
I was totally going to fuck him and then his friend walked in brushing his teeth, whipped down his pants and started doing the windmill. Ultimate cock block
Just got back to the apartment. Why os there now 14 identical toothbrushes in the bathroom and only the two of us live here?
Randomize
