I can't get in trouble, i'm smoking a bong in the office right now
Yeh xou jao i ama wa7tdud !!
Oh my god. its not even twelve thirty and you are useless.
Its official, cigarettes are now more expensive than weed
I'm too high to be shopping. I just contemplated deoderant for fifteen minutes. Now testing pillows
It was not a dingleberry, it was a dinglemelon
I had a dream that I got a gift certificate to a lavish spa from my father. I think dream dad, along with real dad, think I'm gay.
she played "i just wanna get married" by jagged edge while we were having sex. why cant i avoid stage 5 clingers
From the prices on this menu it looks like I have no choice. I have to blow him.
I took us ten minutes to realize the shower sex going upstairs was the reason the kitchen ceiling was flooding.
so far we have 6 big wheels and 10 boxes of wine for the tour de franzia. team drunkslut is favored to win the yellow jersey.
He gave me such a powerful orgasm I blurted out I love you. This is why just rebouding out of a serouis relationship is awkward.
In other news, I'm pretty sure my mom was encouraging me to have a threesome yesterday... I don't even want to start digging in that garden of horror and trauma.
You're finding a boat, I'm going to sleep with a guy that lives above a bar and has 24 hour access. We are really nailing this adulting thing
I'm hoarding IKEA meatballs in my purse
Did I let your boyfriend smear a banana into my face last night? Because I have pictures that are telling me I did....
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