I just saw the girl you left with - Chris Hansen's looking for you
The Masters... another excuse to excessivly start drinking by 1
She was kinda tragic... like a puppy that runs into things. Cute but really stupid. So, yeah, I hit it.
I can't get away from Pickles they're either stuck in me, in my mouth, or I'm stuck in one. fuck my whole entire life.
Shaun got a portable breathalyzer for christmas so now we can tell who the biggest pussy is at the end of the night.
he tried to convince me he was a seal.. sound effects included. and then asked me to 'be his lady seal'.
We saluted the chips to the national anthem before cooking them. The house has to get a munchies fryer
The number of times I have seen your cock and the number of times I have wanted to see your cock are different!
You were my sober police. You had one job and you failed miserably.
I'm a corrupt cop.
But break dance skills will only take you so far
Do you miss the park or do you miss us having sex in public?
Why do I always end up with closet ICP fans?
Alas my dad DD'd me. Legit cock blocked to the highest degree
There is a video of you making out with him, flipping off the camera, and holding the plastic flamigo that you had just stolen out of a yard
We got really excited for country fried steak then we had sex.
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