she has a miserable personality but its a good think you dont have sex with that
pussy has no personality
Amen to that
You probably shouldn't be hiding under someones bed listening to them get head
yes we were fucking thats why i put "watching a movie" in quotations
What. The. Fuck. No, you will not spank me.
That wasn't intended for you, my bad.
Her boobs more than make up for all the flaws with her personality.
imagine how many guys you'd have sex if you didn't recieve your monthly gift.
Fuck buddy has no power. Invited her over to use my shower. I love hurricaines.
Dude. That is just waaaay to much random to process after that tequila battle.
They broke our car window and then wrote "great night" on the next
The worst decision I made last night was allowing myself to be duct taped to the ceiling
Like you know your sex life is in a downward spiral when your best friend offers to sext you from Ireland
so I ate shit in the bar and took a barstool down with me and this guy helped me up and I just started making out with him. I need to stop meeting men like that
Sware then you fell into me doing a Tarzan swing thing and my margherita spilled and shattered all over this guy and sice you were on the ground you tried to pull it off by twerking on the floor lmfao
You were petting your bowl of cocoa puffs and shushing it softly while staring at the mirror
Let's just say if my bucket list had "fngered in the middle of a club by a complete stranger while being sprayed by UV paint" then that is well and truly ticked off.
Randomize
