Be sure to let me know if your relationship crumbles so I can resume hitting on you
Once you see the odd facial expressions and noises a guy makes while he is furiously beating off on top of you, it kind of puts things into perspective.
i mean you're really good at taking the morning after pill...so you could put that on your resume..
yeah, i think fast in a bad sitatuion and am able to react with appropriate measures
i haven't been laid since the bush administration. it's frustrating.
Some advice for success: 1) Go ugly early, it saves you time and money; 2) If you can't pork a princess, pound a pig for practice; and 3) Beauty is only a light switch away.
ur like the dr phil of bizarro world.
just skyped with my friend to listen in on the people talking shit about me in the library. creepy or strategic?
I didn't realize how much I missed him until his balls were back in my mouth..
lesson learned: don't narrate out loud about how a girl is giving you head while she's doing it
i can't understand anything he's saying. But he spells alcohol right everytime so i deciphered it.
That big chick who gave you the handly polished off one of the walls to the ginger bread house right before she came outside. FYI
I can feel the judgmental stares of Christians from around the world right now.
Because 9 pm Thursday you drink a loco cause you just wanna get drunk and have a good time with your friends. Then you wake up on Tuesday and you've had 17 locos and you're pregnant, lying on the side of the road, 3 states over. THAT'S why we don't have only locos parties.
Also, you should've bet on Team Liver.
We won.
USA USA USA
IT'S LIKE LOOKING INTO GOD'S VAGINA!!!!
Dude this weed has me so paranoid.
Yeah tell me about it I just screamed after I coughed because my own cough scared me.
I'm not going to tell you how to live your life, which includes naming your schlong
Randomize