so evidently yelling "gay" everytime your bf tells you how he feels is cause for breakup. news to me
My relationship with VH1 is so bittersweet
what if every blade of grass was a penis?
Also how the fuck did i get like 30 brown napkins
i was focused on more important things... like standing, and not spilling my beer
I really wanna punch him. Right in his cell-phone-sized penis
I can't decide who is the bigger alcoholic: you for opening that bottle of wine just now or me for hearing it in the other room over the air conditioner
I don't think we had sex because when I woke up he was still wearing the chicken suit.
I kept calling him escargot instead of Estaban..I don't think that was the wisest choice.
yeah dropping that class because i really don't want to be known as the girl who fell asleep in class and threw up as she walked out for an entire semester
He said he cried as he watched porn yesterday; I'd say he's taking the break-up pretty bad....
I'm gonna eat more dunkaroos to cope with what's in my vagina.
of fours songebofy did dknt stop believing
how legible are my texts
Like I could say no to two hot people already naked and fucking. Please. I'm not made of stone.
Twice?!
If you sleep with him I will stab you int the uterus with a pitchfork.
Prepare the pitchfork.
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