Her "get-your-paper-done-early-blowjob" incentive is the thing that has successfully deterred my procrastination
He's playing farmville on his phone while puking over the toilet..
And it was confirmed to me that I did in fact cut my girlfriend out of her dress with my sword.
They glued all of the ceiling tiles shut.
oh my god. you caused complete remodeling to a college campus that you don't even go to
No. Her boobs are the one spot of warmth in my life right now and I will not let you take them from me.
I just tried to eat one of my ear plugs, thinking it was a cheese curl. I need it to be break RIGHT NOW.
I hooked up with a British man... Wiz Khalifa has your bra... Couldn't have been a more successful night!
He sent me a picture of his dick saying "your throne my lady" for my birthday. He knows the way to my heart.
He sent a video of him jacking off....class will be awkward tomorrow
He's listening to "my heart will go on" by himself in the living and its not even noon. MAKE IT STOP.
I definitely think you should enjoy one last spring break being a sorostitute before you get serious and settle down with price charming. I mean hes not going to be there any way. he can wait a week.
Idk how much of a virgin he is but I'm tryna find out.
Of two things I'm absolutely sure: 1. I only took 2 hits off that joint and 2. I definitely ran over hedwig on the way home
Have you ever gotten such awesome underwear you wish you didnt have to wear pants?
Hey this is your roommate. You know the one that let you have sex with her while you called out your exs name and cried?
I have no recollection of that. You must have the wrong number. P.s. your thongs still on the ceiling fan.
Randomize
