Seriously dude, you need to stop beating off to the ellen show, it's just weird.
I chose taco bell over sex...
good choice.
Fuck Jersey, the house im in is so baller but this state just cannot win.
why is it that everyone in pennsylvannia gets fucking prego??
I feel I need to conquer him. He's six ft eight and 265lbs. Its like the mount Everest of sex.
the australian girl literally just drank an entire pitcher of beer in about twenty seconds. i want to go to there.
yeah, we figured out that passing a joint between cars was a pretty bad idea
He burnt a smiley face into the screen with a cigarette, peed in my tub and then tried to take off his pants. tried...
It's not quite a landing strip... It's more like a soul patch for my vagina.
Step one go to argentina step two fuck bitches it's a simple plan really
Currently behind the bar at some asian place, pouring drinks for everyone with a snake around my neck
I can't wait for you to tell me about your sex.
It's a short, short story.
I mean, except for the part where I was vomiting up pineapple and hot sauce, it was a really fun time.
This is why you have to watch more Zombie movies- to prepare for End Times...
I swear I have some evil slut demon in me when I'm blacked out
Don't we all.
Randomize
