That's not ass to mouth..... That a rim job!! Are you telling me she licked your asshole?!
Your brother just successfully got half the bar mostly naked
im getting a BJ in a closet
and a penguin just handed me a bong
It's a shame that I don't know his last name. Actually, it's an ever bigger shame that I don't know his first name
He gave them shots of purell and called it "acid rain" jello shots. They took them.
I hate freshman.
I just remembered you had me meet your law professor while I was wasted...how'd that go?
Whoever put the picture of my dad in the condom box is an asshole
Obama's speech on in 9 mins. Me in the shower now. Naked. Make your choice.
I'm bringing the tv in with me.
Just saw a couple do like 5 Sakai bombs and my dad goes "who says love is dead"
Hey, I told her the bathroom was a "No fly zone" after I used it. She willingly allowed her nose to go through that pain. It's her fault, she only supplied me with vodka when she knows I only drink rum.
I need vodka and champagne for my new favorite drink, vodkapagne. Alternative spellings are "vodkapain" and "vom-machine"
Sexual favors are the only currency recognized by the Republic of Greg
"Local woman assaults strangers with sex toy" is a headline I never want to be about me.
I'm intrigued by how his mouth tasted the same as his dick.
its official, you're fucking me on my lunch break. the only thing I want in my mouth is your dick. pick me up at noon.
want fries with that?
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