Party's warming up, a tranny just got here...
dude your alot more fun to hang out around now that your addicted to coke...but seriously you need to stop
There is something about drinking on a golf course and getting with younger women that just really makes me feel at home.
Last night was epic. Hooked up with Emma Watson, found twenty bucks, and then passed out on my floor.
No you didn't. You drank unbelievable amounts of 151, passed out in someone else's bathroom, and we carried you back to your floor. Nice dreams though.
Eric and I got kicked off of karaoke last night. Apparently, singing about masturbation to the tune of "A Whole New World" is not appropriate and definitely frowned upon by the DJ.
I just made my bed perfectly before realizing that I'll be too drunk to appreciate it tonight
its not college until your roomate walks in on you having sex in his bed. twice
Three guys came up to me at the bar and started dancing on me, while screaming "Johnson's girl." That's the last time I sleep with a freshmen.
I hope you enjoy this collage I made of you and me getting fucked up together
Oh man, are we repeating last 4th of July?!
That shouldn't even be a question, it's a tradition now. Hope your manhood is ready.
He managed to find a wheel chair and a super mario hat, now hes rolling around screaming "real life mario kart!"
I just remember lots of butts and something about ranch dressing.
After fooling around at the hotel til dawn, I managed to feed her with my free buffet passes. Tastes like sweet victory.
Last night when we banged she had nothing else on but socks that said 'property of Jesus' on them.
Speaking of dignity, who all saw me....
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