playing new game: drink everytime u see someone at the beach with a tramp stamp, double if u guess it before u see it, triple for male tramp stamps
warning: blackouts possible when playing in ocean city or anywhere in new jersey
Can someone please explain to me how I got rugburn on my tits?
I skipped class, don't know why though bc all I did in the meantime was cook pancakes and watch infomercials..my life sucks
They need a stunt cock, be about 20 more minutes.
Can you bring me a pair of sunglasses to the bathroom please... Don't judge me.
Yeah, but there's no serving sizes for dick.
I just discovered the Reese's pieces and sourdough bread sandwich. No signs of coming down.
if youre pregnant and ruin my spring break i'll never forgive you.
The sad thing is; I'm getting used to walking around feeling like I could hurl at any minute.
The creepiest man is serenading me at the bar right now. I had about a quarter of a drink left and the bartender just walked over and filled it with vodka and walked away laughing.
Can we pretty pretty please go to Mardi Gras tomorrow? I promise I'll be a good girl and not puke in a pledges car
His mom said he was in the ER and asked for prayers and positive thoughts. Apparently, me wishing the clap on him is not what she had in mind.
Just wiped the ashes off my forehead before he came over to have sex. Definitely going to hell.
After we banged he volunteered to ducksit while I went to work. I think that's true love.
It's only awkward the first ten minutes you realize it's not your house.
Randomize
