The two bassists just totally made out. I NEED MENNA'S RIGHT now.
My dad just told me he used to masturbate to cat woman...he then proceeded to beat my brother in beer pong and wont let me play...
No. I remember how loud you used to get. Trust me.
they ran out of ice so they are using frozen shrimp in their drinks
he tried to make a toast, but hit the moving ceiling fan with his beer instead
Well I turned her sobriety into my own personal drinking game
I blew him and did charles barkley impressions at the same time. what a pro
I don't question myself. That's what I have you for.
I'm honored.
Thanks for bringing that stuff to help me feel better...you know, the water, the Gatorade, and the dick. You really are the best friend ever.
So... remember when you threw an orange in the closet when we were 16 to make wine? Just found it. Not wine.
It tasted better than Jesus's hair.
You're going to find someone that you love very much and that loves you, and then you're gonna find an additional person that you literally can't stop staring at from across the room. I feel very confidently about that
STOP SENDING ME NAKED PICTURES WHEN I'M TRYING TO TEACH. MONDAY TUESDAY 1-3 IS A DICK AND ARSE FREE ZONE
He passed out in my car.
What's the problem?
HE'S STILL IN MY FUCKING CAR.
I just saw puke on the road at the same stoplight i threw up at sunday morning! Makes me smile inside.
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