so...dinner was kid's cuisine and a bottle of wine. i think they go well together.
needless to say, I hope she has to get an abortion again
i really wish someone from a royal background would fuck me so i could literally say i was 'royally fucked'.
The dean held back my hair as I was puking after graduation. That means so much more than a diploma and a handshake.
also I just used a straw to drink the juice out of a tomato b/c I forgot how to bite.
I told her that I thought she needed an oral mammogram. With me being pre-med she bought it.
I didn't just randomly come up with it. But if you want to give me extra credit for creativity I have a bare chest and chocolate sauce left
I can only take thier stupid "I think beauty school is for me" routine so long until I have to bitch slap them with some knowledge
If you value your immune system buddy, walk away from that one.
They didn't have a "sorry I was late for your birthday party because I was getting arrested" card.
You are so lucky you didn't go back to Tate's house. They decided to figure out who had the biggest balls... I was the judge
I'M SO LONELY THAT I TEXTED THE FRESHMAN
she keeps dunkaroos and gatorade in her bed. yep pretty sure im in love.
I was gonna start crying but as he was asking me for my info i saw him eyeing my rack. So I sorta started pushing them together. He asked me to get out of the car he made me turn around so he could check me out and then he said and I quote "okay ma'am. Everything is fine, I'm going to let you off with a warning. Next time if you're not wearing yoga pants you might not be as lucky" I am blessed.
I made a nest in his bed. I'm not leaving
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