Godddamnit i jsu woke up in oharee. My connecxtion left an hro ago. Thosse flight atttendants can DRinK
At one point last night while tipping the bartender you looked at him and said "If I need money later, I'm taking this back"
Don't blame the cocaine for your eating disorder.
I ended up taking shots of whiskey and chasing them with potato wedges, I have never felt more Irish
He seemed like a really nice guy. He tried to dry my shirt because someone spilled their drink on me. I think that's how I ended up topless on his dryer.
We're pretty much just dating until one of our ex's wants us back
We don't watch enough power rangers
Saying someone's good at giving head is like saying someone is good at pouring juice like there is that one girl who will spill it everywhere but for the most part it's not that hard to be good at
That was years ago. And it was chlamydia.
So my POF profile is full of Archer references. Only guys who get them will be getting any response to their messages.
I started crying during a meeting at work and now I'm sitting on my couch drinking boxed wine at 1:30 in the afternoon. Fuck you too estrogen.
New rule. If he's too busy to put the "H" in "what" then I'm too busy to put his D in me.
Success! We fucked roommates!
We will discuss everything tomorrow i presume. Including the sweaty naked tango.
Drinking at 10 in the morning and swimming might not be the best idea I've ever had but it beats working
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