Let's make love on the newspapers that declare financial doomsday
Hashbrowns don't come out your nose as easily as you would think
Yes someone did see you carrying a beer bong on the side of coastal highway
Omg I'm so stupid. All the peoples fb status that said "spain" I thought they were all going to spain.......
you should be back in the room by now but just so you know. you passed out at the black jack table and they wheel chaired you out. strip club in about 45 minutes. game face bro.
girl I've been sleeping with this summer as per her request just gave me a carton of cigs to thank me for my "hospitality". this is good.
i am going to show so many millionaires my nipple
When exactly does a bender just become a lifestyle?
Definitely had a dick in my ass while watching the Seahawks win. Best NFC Championship game ever.
I came home braless and wearing a tail....
It turned from Netflix and chill to cringeworthy YouTube videos and chill. At least he's honest.
It wasn't until I lost my earring that I realized "I've been here before". Turns out we fucked a year ago. We've decided to make it a tradition.
I want to be her friend more than I want to fuck her boyfriend.
so my parents definitely heard me when I was cumming last night...
G&T. Gin and tonic. GIN AND TONIC. GIN AND TONIC AND FUCKING LIME
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