I give him blow jobs while he watches sports.. how am I not his gf yet??
my mom just asked me about sexting and if I have ever sent a naked picture to anyone. i fucking hate fox news.
dude i just figured out that the tostitos sign is two people eating chips and salsa. being high totally pays off sometimes
Of course it's dangerous. Why else would they hire us after we failed the drug test?
He wanted to take a picture with our pizza to show his mom that I was pretty but more importantly that he practices in "sober" activities
Those people having sex on the beach kept looking over at you guys throwing his shoes at the seagulls.
That's not how these arrangements work. You don't buy each other stuff unless you break a sex toy. End of story.
Ohhh. Its been awhile. Vending machine hotel condoms are $15 here who can afford to not get herpes?
Dancing naked to Celine dion - im alive. No better way to start the day
He must have sensed I was about to trade him in...he's really stepped up his sex game
You didn't hold all these dicks to become a party planner!
I'm trying to seductively eat these M&M's to let her know its on
You were fine, but your knee injury definitely came from interpretive dancing like a gay fairy with lead wings all around the Mission St BART. Everyone thought you were on drugs.
We banged in his car behind the burrito place. Google Maps keeps asking me to rate my visit. 5/5, would cum again.
I’ve gone two rounds already this morning and I’m ready for a third. The moon is in the house of sluticus hornius.
Randomize
