Help i just walked in on mom blowing dad
I haven't gotten laid in forever. I'm obsessed. I imagine I this is how Ethopians feel about food.
and those juicy C cups turned out to be oddly-shaped A's when her padded bra came off.
Taljing aboutpenisrs w gerruly ska pops
I swallowed your vile semen and you don't know what color my fucking eyes are!?
i finally watched harry potter... a tad unrealistic if you ask me... i mean a ginger kid with 2 friends?
nothing like a tattoo of a large eagle attacking a small eagle whos attacking a shark to bond to siblings together for life
the only thing keeping me going right now is the knowledge that in 2 hours i'll be drunk at the circus.
I think off duty cops drove me home. I may have been hitchhiking
I want to get so drunk, you will need subtitles to understand me. Rough week.
Just participated in the saddest thing: Cheetos. Handjob. I have lost at life
I don't think you should say "suck my dick" and then proclaim to be a messiah, of any sort.
Shut the fuck up! I can hear you having sex over Pirates of the Caribbean you moaning whore.
Ex-boyfriend shit on a ping pong table at a party last night. Taking "party pooper" to a whole new level.
I am now gainfully employed. Parents, lock up your children.
Yay! Welcome to the world of "you're seriously trusting me with your kid?"
Randomize
