I just smoked a bowl while riding a horse. This has been a productive vacation.
Just found 2 diff. colored pubes in my underwear..new record.
both roomates are passed out on the floor. I feel like I'm missing out on crucial bonding time by sleeping in my bed.
swears the blind dude on this train is faking. Every day he stumbles and falls into a different girl's lap and then has to grab her tits to steady himself.
his profile picture is a blurry one of him holding a beer. i recognized him instantly.
Just put a dog collar on someone's child.....was a great hit with everyone but his mom.......I think she hates me. I'm okay.with that
He has a shower chair now. So he sits and watches me shower. It's kind of creepy.
When the shrooms kicked in we both simultaneously realized we were not the right puzzle piece for the dubstep puzzle.
We made eye contact and were like we are not welcome here, the ravers are onto us and we need to get the fuck out before we get shuffled upon
God loves me. So high, craving Jimmy Johns chips, looked down, unopened bag in front of me. Still doesn't feel real
I didn't notice because vodka
He started saying the pledge of allegiance so his boner would go down. Merica.
IM BACK TOGETHER WITH MY BF AND HERE YOU ARE SUCKING DICK FROM 2009
Like he was trying to be sexy but he had shit taste in porn so i left
so does the amount of bruises on my arms and legs mean we had fun last night?
Your shit was massive.
I'm not 100% sure how to respond to that.
If you were in a "who has the massivest shit contest", you'd win by a landslide.
Randomize
