Yeah no shit. My mom is giving me winecoolers as we watch a show abt alcoholics
is sleeping with your Political Science professor Politically incorrect?
Was he helping you 'cram' for your final, or just giving an oral exam?
look, i may have sacrified a 20% assignment for a sprite. this is what hangovers do to me.
we need to stop having unprotected sex.
ya i know. we're like the secret life of the american whores.
So how do we make 4/20 better than every other day we are stoned?
Party at my house. Liquor pinata. Your presence is required.
You played a drinking game to fat people crying. It's a long climb to the moral high ground, why bother?
I just took the soggiest of beer shits and all i have to eat is shredded cheese and more beer. I need an adult.
No gifts needed, but if you have fireworks or weed that'd be good.
Funny how I'm trusting a magic 8 ball I found in the kids toy section to tell me about my sex life
they saw the dick pic he sent and started calling him 'subway'
She deleted me on Facebook. I think it's safe to say that she knows I fucked him now.
its a comptetion of fuckups and im HERE TO WIN
i just wanted have a romantic star gaze moment with him. untill he let out a massive fart.
I teamed up with my vagina. I compromised his morals and then she corrupted him for good. It’s been a very successful and slutty partnership
Randomize
