are you serious?? is your clit as sensitive as your emotions
i wish
Please explain to me what this has to do with my fantasy to fuck larry king?
i wanted to tell my neighbors to shut up it was 4am, but listening to her rag on him for his minute man routine was actually entertaining
Scored tix to flower show. Do we want to go drunk on Saturday or hungover on Sunday? Only two options.
Just found bacon bits in my pocket. Blackout buffet is the best.
I was asking the bouncer, "if I fall will you catch me?" which then turned into "if I jump off the roof will you catch me?" He said no.
so getting blacked out last night has made my lips so beautifully red for pictures today... and they say nothing good comes from alcohol
Should I get the rainbow boxer breifs???
As your boyfriend, this is a level of gay that even I can't handle.
Slap a cop in the butt for a felony charge. Check.
I have done everything sexualally imaginable with that umpalumpa
I should buy myself lingerie for Valentine’s Day instead of a present for you because I am the present
she said she doesn't remember seeing me at all last night. ...I was with her for six hours, there's no way she could have been blackout the whole time
I would like to make it known to all of you that my penis is official retired, but it thanks you for the countless years of service you provided
i cant believe the cop was fine with you saying no we are in a hurry when he asked to search your car
My favourite part was when you contorted upside down in the tub and said "I don't want to be upside down"
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