I think men at large are the problem in most or all relationships. It's like trying to drag a three-legged retarded puppy through an obstacle course
Come here. I'm drunk. Family Function. Intense Pro-life vs. Pro-choice debate. Bring Republicans.
just so you know, the uglier twin gives better bjs..don't be deceived
You act like this is the first time i've fingered two 17 year olds at the same time
i have one question about last night
if this is about your fridge being filled with hotdogs, sour cream, and PB&J open-faced sandwiches, i can explain
Well now I have my semen on her headphones
You can't just hum the Jaws theme song when you pull down my pants.
I lost a little respect for your boyfriend when I learned that he has a scar from a Cheerio.
Cuz its complicated and I hate complicated and I miss your penis
No it's okay, we're just driving to random places with the portable stripper pole and causing a ruckus.
Oh that's normal
please let it be arousing that I used numbers to figure out how well I'd give you head
He was stoned and starts screaming, "I ain't got but a dollar, I wanna hear waterfalls!". Maybe he can hang with us....
My life has evolved from screwing randos, ok?
That was before I lit my hair on fire
omg last night while walking home from your house I stole a seatless bike and carried it into my next door neighbors kitchen.. we just looked It up online it's an antique and worth $500 dollars
Randomize
