I never doubt that you might be drinking at any moment.
elementary school lunch room party. everyone brings their own lunch and can trade stuff. all juice is booze.
I hope that the reason I've been psycho on him is that I'm pregnant and not just psycho.
i just made my gag reflex go away.
Caught my drug dealer jacking off. I think this is a new step in our relationship
Chipotle chips and wine for breakfast. Its def game day
She just drank the vanilla extract. Again. AGAIN. No one should be that eager to get drunk.
On that note if you see a hobo smiling with a pack of cigarettes and an AMP energy drink, that was my good deed for the day
Nope. If I'm going to drive an hour to fuck a teacher, it will NOT be missionary thats for damn sure.
I just took two shots of Burnerts out of a ladle. Get here now.
That's probably when I climbed a tree and told everyone I was an ornament
My purpose is to unleash drunk self on strangers, i believe as some terrifying icebreaker, otherwise i too would offer my driving services.
I want to be "performing a disservice to society by actually wearing clothes in public" hot.
Did I seriously answer the door for a home delivery of weed from you and your boss while wearing last night's 80s rockstar face paint?
I need an outfit for the bar tmrw that reads I have daddy issues and would like a fancy sugar daddy.
Randomize
